Guns!

James:  I think this [gold plated 1911 pistol] is what I'd recommend you get.  I'd buy a pair and get them engraved with some cool roses, maybe some thorns, to represent the dichotomy of good and evil.  A couple of skulls on the grips would be a classy move as well.

Bruce:  Personally, I would recommend a grenade launcher (like the HK M320) becuase getting the bad guys is worth destryong all your possessions and possibly killing your family members and/or neighbors

J.T.:  I like the grenade launcher machine gun (GMG), a novel concept if I may say so.

J.T.:

This encounter would have ended very differently with a fully automatic grenade launcher.

Bruce: You're right.  The headline would have read, "Chuck E. Cheese's In Flames After Grandmother Defends Family with Grenade Launcher"

Witnesses say the first grenade maimed the offenders and also destroyed the table at which they were sitting.  Then the woman continued firing what's being described as a "grenade machine gun" amidst the chaos of screaming and running children until she "cleaned up their language for them,"  shes's quoted as saying.  The restaurant said the woman won't have to pay for her meal but will have to pay approximately $350,000 for damage done to the structure, ball pit and play area, and the animatronic singing animals.

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